purpleparadox: (Cranky Em)
Oh my lord. I found one of my backup CDs, back from when I first figured out I should be backing up my important computer crap. This thing is like a time capsule! It's got the first version of the story I'm rewriting for NaNoWriMo, a million pictures that are so tiny now that my monitor shows things in 1600x900 resolution (instead of 800x600), bad fanfiction, and loads of pictures of people I used to talk to online back in 2002 and 2003. Wow. This thing is a friggin' goldmine. XD

In other news, I applied for a job. I don't think anything will come of it, but I need to get a job other than working as a student assistant. I'd be working tech support for one of the local ISPs, which would actually be something in my field, rather than working in CLEAR. I love it there, don't get me wrong, but I think working for Fused Solutions might be a better career move, yanno?

Speaking of work, I get to work at Levitt tonight. Yaaaay.
purpleparadox: (NaNo '10)
With less than a week until NaNoWriMo (OMG OMG OMG), I figure I should ask if anyone wants to be on my NaNoWriMo filter, since I'll probably be posting a lot about how I can't reach my word counts, my characters are not behaving, and so on, and not everyone wants to read that.

So, if you want in on the filter, let me know! :D
purpleparadox: (Default)
Wow, I have been extraordinarily quiet this month. I apologize for that. I read everyone's posts, and comment when I have something to say, but mostly I've just been lurking in the background. I'm good at that, I guess.

I've got a doctor's appointment today. I hope I find out the results of my blood tests, and that the results aren't scary. Tomorrow is counseling, and I hope I don't end up sounding like a gibbering idiot in there. Is it sad that I have to take notes in order to actually talk about what needs to be talked about, instead of staring out the window and stuttering?

Next week at this time, I will be noveling. OMG IT'S ALMOST NANO TIME. I have been so hyper over NaNoWriMo this year that it's crazy. I even made a research poster on NaNo. It's beautiful. I'll have to post a PDF of the completed version up at some point.

I don't want to go to work today. I don't feel like I've had enough weekend yet. I ended up spending most of the weekend cooped up inside, since the weather was crap and Bryan wasn't feeling well. (He spent most of yesterday in bed.) I'll be happy to get out of the house, but sometimes I actually want to do something other than work and class, yanno? Maybe next weekend I'll just go to the library and work on noveling notes or something.
purpleparadox: (Dexter)
I started playing World of Warcraft again! :D

I'm on Garrosh, but I'm considering a realm transfer - I don't really know anyone there, and I'd love to find people to talk to while I play. It was very lonely out there today, wandering around Tarren Mill and finishing some old quests with nobody to talk with. Here's hoping I can either find a good guild to join, or scrape up the money to do a realm transfer.

In other news, Bryan and I had a nice and relaxing day today. In between bouts of gaming (him on Minecraft, me on WoW), we took a walk, winterized our kitchen and bathroom windows, made lunch, and I took a nap while Bry gamed some more. We also went and got Chinese food for dinner - I had some yummy sweet and sour chicken with fried rice, and Bryan had mushu pork. He enjoyed it. :) So, yes, a nice day. I'm still dealing with some weird Wellbutrin side-effects, but they're not too bad. The one thing that really sucks is my lack of appetite - or, more accurately, lack of desire to eat food. I get hungry, but not insistently hungry. Also, I get too sleepy. I'm trying to decide if I should take it in the morning or in the evening - I'll try a few more days of taking it in the morning, and see how it goes. It could just be that I was tired this weekend from dealing with everything during the week. Or it could be whatever Dr. Moose had a blood test done for. Who knows.

Anyhow, I'm going to go watch some more Bones, and relax before work and class tomorrow.
purpleparadox: (Default)
So, Alex was here less than 24 hours! Ah well. He does have a lot of work to do for grad school, and the class he teaches, so it's alright.

I'll admit, the visit was a little awkward. I guess it always is awkward, when an ex boyfriend visits. Bryan was very good about it, though, and I think the guys enjoyed each others company. We talked about wine, video games, and life in general. I tried very hard to be normal. I think I succeeded. We ended up spending last night sitting around, drinking chocolate wine and watching Dexter and talking, and this morning Alex and I went to his favorite diner while Bryan set up for the farmers market, and then all three of us hung out there for a bit. Then, Alex and I came back here because I wasn't feeling too well (stupid Wellbutrin side effects), and then he headed out.

Yeah, I'm back on Wellbutrin, for anxiety and depression. I also had blood drawn yesterday, to check and see if the reason I'm so tired and libido-less is because of my thyroid or some other reason. The medicine is wreaking havoc on my insides, so I'm curled up on the couch, watching the best vampire movie ever - Interview With The Vampire. No sparkles, no werewolves. Just vampires, and Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise. :D

I'm debating on giving up my Saturday shifts at the Levitt Center for good - I really do need the time off to relax. It's so nice to not have to get up and rush to get dressed and dash out the door. I wonder if anyone would be willing to take it...
purpleparadox: (Default)
I've been quiet lately, I know. I spent the weekend in Lake George, and purposely didn't bring my laptop, so that explains this weekend's absence. I've been reading everyone's entries, but haven't really had much to talk about.

I've re-discovered my love for Dream Theater. They're a prog-rock band that Justin introduced me to back when we were dating, back in 2001. We got to see them twice in concert, and I really love their stuff. I fell out of the habit of listening to them when they took a turn towards the metal side, and I wasn't a huge fan of metal back then... Now, my tastes have changed, and I'm rediscovering them and remembering old favorite songs, and it's awesome.

I get very frustrated when the girls from the sorority I was in call me directly and ask me to cover their shifts at the computer lab. They expect me to take their shifts because I'm a 'sister'. I don't want to work for them because I literally can't (I'm working 40 hours a week for the college, and I can't work any more), and I don't want to work for them on principle - they ONLY talk to me when they need something, and usually it's covering one of their shifts. Just because I'm working at Levitt doesn't mean it's my only job, and I can't drop everything to work your shift. Plan better, and post to the damn email list. It's there for a reason - so you can find someone to cover your shift.

I'm bordering on the edge of wanting to hide for no reason. Yesterday afternoon, all I did was curl up in bed and watch Bones for 5 hours. I'd like to do that tonight, but I have to go to yoga. I'll feel better after yoga.
purpleparadox: (Dexter)
I swear, Lily Allen sounds like Lila from season 2 of Dexter when she talks in Knock 'Em Out. It's cool and slightly unnerving, considering how friggin' psycho Lila was.

I have no life whatsoever anymore. I am defined by my jobs, my classes, and that's it. I am Bethlynn Hoey, Graduate Assistant. I am "one of the Hoeys", good at videos and graphic design and 99% of what is tossed at me in class. There's no time to be myself - the me who likes to sit and watch TV for hours, and read books, and do crafts, and drink wine and sleep in late and watch old anime. I feel... stifled, I guess.

Why the hell did I think working 40 hours a week in addition to taking classes was a good idea?

NaNoWriMo is going to be insane. At least while I'm pounding away at the keyboard I can be myself. I can ramble about nonsense and call it noveling, I can live vicariously through my characters and have some fun.

My friend Alex is coming up next weekend. I'm somewhat excited - I haven't seen him in, what, four years? I'm not getting my hopes up too much, though - he said he was going to come up in April and never did. It'll be the first time we've slept under the same roof in 6 years, too. (Yeah, Alex is an ex boyfriend as well as a friend. He's one of the few exes I'm actually friends with.)

I don't want to go to work.
purpleparadox: (Default)
I'm going a little NaNoWriMo crazy this year, even moreso than in years past. I think I may have found my winner.

(Ugh, you say that every year. You never win. You've only gotten halfway once.)

I've got a cover made up, too. It's a vectorized version of an old drawing I did of the main character of the story, back when she was just an RP character.

A Month In The Life
by ~baranotenshi on deviantART

purpleparadox: (Fall)
It's Wednesday, which means it's my early day. I get out of work at 1:30, and done with classes at 3:15, which means I can do some midweek cleaning! I've also got my first yoga class tonight, so here's hoping that goes well. (At least I know if I don't like it, I can get a refund)

My counseling appointment yesterday was a disaster. It got to the point where I was stuttering, couldn't get a coherent thought out, it was miserable. I've started writing stuff down I want to go over in counseling, so I can spit it out more coherently instead of sitting there, fidgeting, and going "ah shit I can't form a sentence". I almost cried at the end. Ugh.

Work yesterday was okay, though, once I calmed down. And class was fun - I spent three straight hours drawing up stuff for my flash project, and putting together the beginning of my game. Once I put the music in and stuff, I might put the intro up here for everyone to see! :)

I get to work the farmers market this weekend with Bry, since one of the girls at the computer lab wants to switch shifts with me. I missed working the market. It's nice to be outside for a few hours, soaking up the sunshine and talking to nice people. And now that I know how to sell wine, I can actually help Bry instead of just sitting there working on punch embroidery.

Watched the first episode of the new season of Dexter last night! It was intense, and a little depressing. I liked it, though. I've been waiting for this since January, hahah.

I should probably brush my hair and get ready for work....

ps- I'm back on twitter. If you've got twitter, follow me: bunzilla82.
purpleparadox: (Oooooo.)
Got out of class early, which is wonderful. My friend Janel drove me home, and I changed into comfy clothes and poured myself a glass of wine. :) It's good stuff, the green apple gewurztraminer I bought a million bottles of. Good occasional stress reliever, too. Mmm, apples.

Anyway! Class today was more of "I know this already, why am I here? Oh, to prove that I actually do know this". I ended up working on my portfolio during classes, to be honest. I did what the professor took an entire class time to explain and put it up on my website twice. (He had us convert Powerpoint presentations to a web friendly format.) If you'd like to take a look at my piddly portfolio, head here. My newest stuff is under Presentations, and there's some stuff under Video too that I put up today.

Work is good. I managed to get ALL MY FILING DONE OMG. It was an epic undertaking, but there was honestly nothing else left to do, so off I went.

Discovered Lily Allen's music lately. I'm kinda addicted. XD

Tomorrow is my long day. Much like longcat, long day is long. Not looking forward to it much, but oh well, what can you do?
purpleparadox: (Weeeeeellll...)
-Made a counseling appointment for Tuesday. Hopefully things can get sorted out then.

-Took Friday and Saturday off from work and went with Bryan to work the Wine and Brew Fest at Hunter Mountain, in the Catskills. Had lots of fun, sold a lot of wine, and was generally very busy. I'm amazed I wasn't so overwhelmed with the amount of people there! (I did snap at the end of the day, when I'd spent 5 hours on my feet with no food.) We stayed in an... interesting hotel, one of the ritziest I've ever been in, and I am very glad to be home.

-Visited my in-laws and my sister.

-Bought an insane amount of wine. My favorite wine was on sale this week, Adirondack Winery's Orchard Blossom (a green apple gewurstraminer), so I bought seven bottles. Hope it'll last me until next May.

-Procured a stuffed Pomeranian. It's probably the closest I'll get to owning a Pomeranian for a few years. I've named her Kaya Flufferpants.

I should go to bed - I have to work in the morning, and I know I won't want to get up in the morning.
purpleparadox: (Depressed)
For some reason, I feel very embarrassed talking about this. I have to get it out somehow, though, and I think I'd be even more embarrassed bringing this up to my one real-life friend (Michelle), so you guys get to deal with me. Yaay.

To put it bluntly and short, I think I might have Asperger's Syndrome.

It would explain a hell of a lot about why I am the way I am. I suck at normal conversations and social interactions. I focus too much on random and obscure stuff, to the exclusion of things I should be worrying about. (Do you need to know something about Sailor Moon? I can give you the birthdays of half the characters, and tell you the original air dates of each season, and tell you all about how they cut so much out of the American version and what they cut out, but ask me about classwork, like Flash, and I'll give you a blank stare.) I have to stick to my morning and evening routines or I get really out of whack. (Each morning, I get up, take my blanket and put it on my chair, go get a cup of coffee, and surf the internet until 7:30, when I get dressed. I talk to Bryan, and we get ready together - even his being gone on Friday mornings throws me off. At night, I retrieve my blanket from where I left it on my desk chair, read or watch TV in bed, and then burrow under said blanket in a very specific way and sleep - if the blanket is gone, there is no way in hell I can sleep) I can't make friends for shit. I just don't know how to relate to people in real life.

I almost want Asperger's to be the answer to all that's wrong with me, because then it will have a label. Then, I can say "oh, it's because of this" and not feel like such a horrible, miserable failure of a human being.

I'm going to see if I can meet with Dr. Moose this week and bring it up with him - he's my usual doctor at Student Health Services. I really hope he doesn't laugh me out of his office. I don't know what I'd do then. I don't know where else to go.
purpleparadox: (Default)
I promise I'll pick up the meme again someday... I've just been so busy and distracted and stuff that I dropped off the face of the internets for a few days. I'm back, though.

My ruffles arrived today! I was also brave enough to dress in ruffles to work today, and nobody told me to go home and change, so I think it was a success. I may make Thursdays ruffle day at work. Lord knows I have enough ruffle clothes to wear to do it.

aaand I got bombarded with phone calls and mailings to do. 15 minutes left of the day, then I get to sit in Dunn for two and a half hours, and then Levitt for three. Woo.
purpleparadox: (Poupee Girl)
Well, I survived a second week of classes and work. I'm amazed!

I'm going to work on getting brave enough to wear Loli to work or class. I used to wear it nearly every day in the spring - granted, I didn't wear it to babysitting, and I would get some strange looks in class, but the professors didn't bat an eye. It's half tempting to set up my portable closet in my office in Dunn and hang all my Loli clothes in there, and just change before class.

Speaking of Loli! I bought some theraputic ruffles today. I bought this skirt, this blouse, and this jumperskirt. Bryan will probably give me 'the look' and say "Well, it's your money, dear." I haven't bought anything new since springtime, so I think it's time. I'm hoping to wear the red skirt to the office - not sure if it'll fly, but it looks a lot tamer than my Alice in Wonderland skirt and my puppy skirt. (It should fit better than they do, too.)

Anyway, meme time! I'm going to catch up today and do two. :D

Day 06 - Your Day

I'll tell you about my day yesterday, since my day today is only three hours old. :P

Yesterday, I woke up at 3 am, when Bryan's alarm went off to remind him that he's gotta work the farmers market at 7 in a town two hours away. I rolled over and slept until 6 am, then crawled out of bed, put my bathrobe on, and internetted for two hours. (I also got dressed somewhere in there.) Then, around 8, my friend Michelle came and picked me up for work, and we went to work. Beth Ann was using Michelle's computer when we got there, so we wandered off to get coffee, and then came back and worked all day. It was insane yesterday - I didn't realize we had two events on campus today, so I was doing a lot of extra stuff in addition to my usual answering the phones and charging credit cards. It was busy, but fun. (We've got a triathlon and a piano competition happening on campus right now.) At 3, I finished up at CLEAR and puttered around for 15 minutes before giving up and going to the computer lab to wait for my shift to start. My co-worker, Umer, had the same idea. (I used to be a little afraid and very annoyed with Umer, but now that he's opened up and talks to me, I actually don't mind him too much.) I worked from 4-6 at the computer lab, and Umer talked my ear off the whole time, alternating between telling me about his family and wishing he had money for one of the new iPod Touches. Then, at 6, I went home, dealt with a grumpy Bryan, talked to Michelle online for a little bit, gave up on the internet, and crawled into bed with my iPod and Dexter at 8. I watched the gleefully gruesome misadventures of Dexter for a few hours before I passed out.

And that was my day!

Day 07 - Your Best Friend

I don't know if I have a best friend anymore. I used to. Her name was Rin, and we were very attached to each other. We used to spend lots of time talking to each other online, and sometimes we'd talk on the phone. I think the reason why we started drifting away initially was work and stuff, but when I had some issues with Bryan last summer, she told me I should dump him. I ended up doing exactly the opposite, and she is still of the opinion that he's not good for me, so she stopped talking to me before he and I got married. I'm still bitter about that, honestly. I mean, none of my friends thought Franco was good for me, but they still stuck around, even when I was being really dumb and sticking with him.

I guess the closest I have to a best friend right now is Michelle. We work together, and we're a lot alike - both socially awkward, both into nerdy things, and we both ramble on about random stuff. Michelle would fit in perfectly in my family, eheh. I'm pretty comfortable around her, and she always listens to me, just like I always listen to her. I hope I don't scare her off.

The rest of the days )
purpleparadox: (Oooooo.)
I missed a day yesterday. I was so exhausted by the time I got home that I just showered and crawled into bed.

Day 05 – Your definition of love

Oh lord, this is a tough one. There are many different forms of love, and all of them have different descriptions. I can't begin to give my definition of them all.

I'll put it simply - love is love. I love lots of people in lots of different ways, but that doesn't take away from the fact that love is love.

The rest of the days )

Sorry for the short entry today, guys. I'm just beat.
purpleparadox: (Down)
I am feeling rather antisocial tonight. I just want to crawl under all my blankets and go to sleep. It's very tempting to do that, actually - there's really nothing for me to do here at the office, and it'd be very nice to change into pajamas and curl up under the blankets with a book.

I am so very caffeine deprived right now. I almost fell asleep a little while ago, honestly.

Maybe I should go home.

Day 04 – What you ate today

Hahahahah. Today was one of the least healthy food days I've had in a while. I skipped breakfast, then had a piece of cake for a midmorning snack with my co-worker Michelle. The cake made us both wibbly with the insane amount of sugar in it. Lunch was delayed until 3:30, when I finally got to the ICT office and could microwave stuff - I had Easy Mac and some cheese crackers. For dinner? Poutine fries. (For those who don't know, it's french fries with cheese and gravy on them. SO GOOD.) I needed the comfort food, it's one of those days where I've been overstimulated and just need to hide.

The rest of the days )

Sorry for the short entry today, guys. I'm just beat.

Labor day!

Sep. 6th, 2010 09:25 am
purpleparadox: (Default)
Hooray, no work today! Although all that means is my day starts in the afternoon, instead of the morning. I'm not complaining. :)

I might go hang out in the ICT office for a bit today, I'm not sure. I have some nerdy things to hang up in there, and I don't know why, but I like hanging out there. It's probably because the professors are super cool, and most of my fellow students are awesome. Some of them are a little strange, but that happens, especially in a program that attracts so many nerds.

I can't believe how chilly it is in here. I guess fall finally came, after that one last crazy heat wave.

Day 02 – Your first love

I'm going to take this to mean the first person I realized I was really, truly in love with, and not the first person I said "I love you" to.

Anyhow, my first love, my first real, true love, was Justin. We started dating almost 10 years ago, in the second semester of my freshman year. We were both a mess - we were both dealing with depression, and I was dealing with all sorts of other crap. His mom was the one who took me to my first actual counseling session. We had some really good times, though - there would be days where we'd just sit next to each other and read books. Other times we'd go to the rec park in Malone and go walk the trails with his dog, Buckwheat. One of my favorite memories was when we went out in his dad's old Mustang convertible during the Perseid meteor shower back in 2001, late at night, and pulled over on the side of the road out in the country and just laid back and watched the shooting stars.

I'm glad that after all we've been through, and all the crap I put him through, we're still friends. He actually asked if he could come to my wedding, and I told him "of course you can, silly". Out of all the ex boyfriends I have, he's one of the few that I talk to on a regular basis.

The rest of the days )

30 Day Meme

Sep. 5th, 2010 07:33 pm
purpleparadox: (Fall)
I'm stealing this idea from [personal profile] wyldbutterflies, since it sounds like an excellent way to help all my new friends get to know me. Also, I like memes.

30 Day About Me Meme

Day 01: Introduce Yourself

Oh lordy, I am never good at introducing myself. I always start with "My name is Beth", and then start rambling about something nonsensical, like nerdy things or stupid random things that happened to me. Only once has that actually gotten me a friend.

So, I'll approach this in a different way!

My name is Beth. I'm 28 years old. I'm recently married, to a wonderful man named Bryan. He puts up with my craziness. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder when I was 16, and anxiety when I was 18. I also have other health problems, but they don't impact me nearly as much as the depression crap. I name my electronics - my desktop is Kitra 2 (Kitra 1 was an HP Pavillion that died a spectacular death a few years ago), my laptop is called Silver, my old laptop is named Snowball, my iPod is named Touchie, and my eBook reader is simply named Book. I get funny looks when I refer to my electronics by name. I am territorial, I sleep with a security blanket, I dress in Gothic Lolita sometimes, and I am addicted to coffee.

I like anime and manga and video games, but I'm nowhere near as rabidly fangirly as I used to be. I still have one hell of a Sailor Moon collection, though, and I'm proud of still being a fan 13 years after I discovered the show. I like to read fantasy novels, and I absolutely love Anne Bishop's works. She is the only author I'm a hardcore fan for - I own every novel she's written. I absolutely love the Ace Attorney series of games for the Nintendo DS - I plan on owning every single game in the series someday. (I am one game short of my goal - apparently it's hard to find Apollo Justice anywhere.) I used to be absolutely obsessed with Princess Peach, and have dressed as her for Halloween twice.

I go to graduate school and I work. I am in the MSEd: Educational Technology Specialist program, and I work three jobs - as a graduate assistant at the Center for Lifelong Education and Recreation, a computer lab supervisor at the Levitt Center, and as an unpaid graduate assistant at the Information and Communication Technology office (or whatever the hell we're calling ourselves, now that we've merged with Computer Science - I don't care, so long as they don't take my office away). I've found that keeping myself very busy keeps me from wallowing in depression. You should have seen me last fall, when my only obligation was to show up to Levitt two nights a week. I was a mess. All I did was drink coffee, lay on the couch, and work on my NaNoWriMo novel.

I'm trying to get more active and lose some weight - I tend to eat junk food when I'm stressed, and I've recently banned myself from eating anything that comes from a vending machine. Also, working out keeps the depression away, which is nice. I am also trying to write in my journal daily - it helps keep me sane. Welcome to my life. I hope I haven't scared anyone off yet.

The rest of the days )
purpleparadox: (Fall)
I do not want to go to work in an hour. I'd rather be taking a nap. Instead, I get to sit in the computer lab for four hours, nursing some coffee and working on homework. Homework is okay. The lab? I'd rather not be doing homework there. I'd rather be in my toasty-warm office in Dunn, or even here, but the computer lab? No.

My iPod cord bit the dust today, sadly. Makes me sad, but at least it's better than the entire iPod biting the dust. This way, I can listen to music while I work and ignore my co-worker, who I'm not overly fond of.

I got a new Nintendo DS, since the one we have is super old and the pink DS Lite I had, I ended up selling. I got a burgundy DSi XL. HOLY CRAP THE SCREENS ARE HUGE. I love playing Phoenix Wright games on it. :D I should get back into playing games, considering the huge amount of video games in my office in Dunn.

This is a very random, disjointed entry, and I apologize for that.
purpleparadox: (Hiding)
I don't know if anyone else does this, but I've noticed I listen to different music during the spring and summer than I do in the fall and winter. Maybe I'm the only one who does this. I dunno. But I don't mind.

During the spring and summer, I tend to listen to really upbeat stuff. Electric Light Orchestra, Daft Punk, Justice, lots of classic rock, even some pop music. I don't usually listen to the radio often, but during the summer sometimes a pop song will get itself stuck in my head and it won't leave. Summer is when the really eclectic stuff in my playlist comes out to play. Pop, dance music, classic rock, anime soundtrack songs... yeah. The random stuff comes out and annoys Bryan a lot, haha.

In the fall and winter, the other stuff comes out. Tori Amos, Ayreon, Goldfrapp, Parov Stelar, Mono, Bitter:Sweet, and Ladytron. I tend to go through phases when I listen to only one album over and over again. A few years ago, all I listened to all winter long was Tori. Winter 08'/'09, I listened to Ayreon's Into the Electric Castle from the start of the first snow until the ice started to melt, five straight months. I tend to listen to more depressing stuff, more serious stuff. Maybe it's because of the seasonal depression, maybe it's just because it fits the season better.

It's strange how eclectic and random my summer musical tastes are in comparison to my fall and winter ones. In summer, I might listen to one song on repeat for an hour and then go peruse my playlist, while in winter I'll listen to one album straight through, then another, then another, and then listen to a specific album for a week straight.

I wonder what that says about me. Does it make me two completely different people, at least musically? If you listed all these tastes separately, the summer and the winter, it would look like it was two different people's music tastes.

Then again, essentially I am two different people. During the summer, I'm enthusiastic, exuberant, almost manic. I want to be out there in the sun, I want to run around until I'm exhausted and it's dark out and the dew is falling. I want to go swimming, I want to go wander through downtown Lake George, I want to bike in the woods and I want to look at the beautiful green trees. I run around in tanktops and shorts and get tan lines on my feet from my sandals. When the leaves fall, though, I become introspective, introverted, and quiet. I keep to myself. I hide behind my computer screen, my glasses, my headphones and my homework. I camouflage myself under big thick sweaters and silly headbands. I cry a lot, and wish the sun would come back. I live off of coffee and junk food and the Internet.

Maybe I am two different people. The me during the summer is who I truly feel I am, and the winter person is someone who takes over when the snow comes and the sun goes away, when I hide and wait for the warmth to come.


purpleparadox: (Default)
The Purple Paradox

February 2011

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